Jing Xin
I came to the United States alone in 2012 and I met Sister Wendy through God’s amazing plan in June 2017. She bore witness to me God’s work in the last days, God’s creation of the universe and all things, God’s three stages of work to save humans, and the truth about how to discern the true God from the false gods. I was very surprised at her words because I knew neither that the heavens and earth and all things were created by God, nor that among the myriad things of creation there is one true God, much less that He has done so much work among us. So I listened to her very attentively.
From that day on, I’d go to Sister Wendy’s room after work. Besides listening to her reading of God’s word and fellowshipping about the truth, we also watched various videos that praise God with dances, songs, readings and recitations of God’s words. Although there were many truths that I did not understand, I liked how the sister communicated God’s words with me and loved to watch those videos. Watching how freely the brothers and sisters were dancing and singing to the glory of God, I was deeply engaged, feeling that believing in God make people happy and blessed, and I also loved living in that way. Later, I was introduced to more brothers and sisters and we had gatherings every week. Life has become very enriched and that’s how my faith in God started….
In my following experiences, I gradually realize God’s realness and loveliness. I can tell that God is real and alive and He is around me, listening to my prayers, guiding the way for me, and leading me through the storm. This made me feel that my life has become inseparable from God….
Not long after I have accepted God’s work of the last days, I faced a problem—getting the post certificate. I would have faced unemployment if I had failed the exam. For a 58 years old, finding a job is never an easy task, therefore this exam was very important to me. But it made me nervous by just thinking of it. What worst is that the questions are in English and I only learned the basics. With bad memories since young, I found learning and memorizing the questions tough for me, who is old now. Worried that I would fail the exam, I stopped working to focus on my exam. I rented a quiet room and studied hard every day but my progress was very slow. After I learned something, I just forgot it the very next second. Filled with distress, I had no time to cook and just grabbed anything edible to fill my stomach every day. Gradually, my energy and physical strength started to drop. I had headaches memorizing the questions. The more I tried to memorize them, the more I became confused and puzzled. I even got some of them mixed up. Thinking that I had put in so much effort and still could not memorize a lot of questions, I felt worried that I would fail the exam. As the exam was just around the corner, I became more and more stressful. I wanted to pass the exam but my energy and memory said otherwise. In just 10 days, I lost about 10 pounds.
One day Sister Anna came to visit me. After knowing my situation, she read God’s words to me: “Perhaps you are a president, a scientist, a pastor, or an elder, but no matter how high your office, if you rely on your knowledge and ability in your undertakings, then you shall always be a failure and shall always be bereft of the blessings of God …” (“God Presides Over the Fate of All Mankind”).
“Where you will go every day, what you will do, who or what you will encounter, what you will say, what will happen to you—can any of this be predicted? People cannot foresee all these occurrences, much less control how these situations develop. In life, these unforeseeable events happen all the time; they are an everyday occurrence. These daily vicissitudes and the ways they unfold, or the patterns they follow, are constant reminders to humanity that nothing happens at random, that the process of each event’s occurrence, each event’s ineluctable nature, cannot be shifted by human will. Every occurrence conveys an admonition from the Creator to mankind, and it also sends the message that human beings cannot control their own fates. Every event is a rebuttal to humanity’s wild, futile ambition and desire to take its fate into its own hands. … From these daily vicissitudes to the fates of entire human lives, there is nothing that does not reveal the Creator’s plans and His sovereignty; there is nothing that does not send the message that ‘the Creator’s authority cannot be exceeded,’ that does not convey this eternal truth that ‘the Creator’s authority is supreme’” (“God Himself, the Unique III”).
Sister Anna fellowshipped with me: “God’s words tell us that our destiny is in God’s hands, our paths are all in God’s arrangements. For example, when and where we will be, where we will work, and what job we will do, everything and anything is in God’s hands. We cannot control our own destiny and future. Despite the fact that we have our own choices and desires and want to use our own abilities to achieve them, what will happen in the end is not something we can control. The progress and the result of everything will not change because of our will, it is all in God’s control, and hence our worries and concerns are useless. What we should really do is to worship God with all our hearts, follow God’s words in our practice, get rid of our planning and desires, and submit to his sovereignty and arrangements. We always say ‘Man proposes, God disposes’ and ‘Do one’s best and leave the rest to God.’ We can try our best to learn and study to cooperate with God and entrust the difficulties during the process to God. No matter how it turns out, we will accept God’s arrangements and plans willingly and therefore we will not feel so stressed out and worried either. Furthermore, we need to believe that whatever God plans for us is good for us. Maybe we do not think it’s good for a limited time and the result is not what we want. But it is good in God’s perspective. Let’s just entrust ourselves to God, that’s absolutely right!”
Later, Sister Anna read me another passage of God’s words: “So, in your opinions, what is the greatest wisdom? With your current statures and with the time since you started believing in God, in what way should you practice that possesses the greatest wisdom? You’ve never thought of this, have you? Say there is a person who appears incapable, slow of speech, and taciturn. But in their heart they have the greatest wisdom that no one else has. Most people don’t do what this person does and when they see this person doing this they think them stupid, that what they do is superfluous, and they say: ‘Why are you always doing this? You follow the rules too much and you believe in God in such a stupid way. Is there any need to do that?’ So think about it, what exactly is the greatest wisdom? (Always quieting one’s heart before God, praying more to God, being close to God in all things.) You’ve touched a little upon it here. What are you aiming for in getting close to God? (To seek out God’s will.) And what are you aiming for by seeking out God’s will? (To find a path for practice.) You’ve understood the general meaning. Is your aim in seeking out God’s will to be reliant on God? (Yes.) By relying on God, are you making things easier for yourself? God does it all so you don’t have to, so you don’t have to go to any trouble. Is this wisdom? Let Me tell you: The greatest wisdom is to look to God and rely on God in all things” (“Believers Must Begin by Seeing Through the World’s Evil Trends”).
Sister Anna continued to fellowship: “From God’s words we can tell that relying on God and looking upon God is the greatest wisdom. In our view, many things could be tough for us and somethings could be unachievable in our reach, but with God’s guidance and enlightenment, achieving them can be unbelievably easy. Because God is almighty and omniscient, and with God there is nothing He can’t do. If we do not rely on God, only doing things in our will and strength, the result may be unpleasant. Just like scientists doing research to obtain scientific achievements, their success is 99 percent perspiration and 1 percent inspiration. Without that 1 percent inspiration, their 99 percent perspiration will be a waste, and that’s how important that share of inspiration is! Hence whenever we are in doubt or trouble, we need to pray to God, pouring out to Him whatever is in our hearts, telling Him that we feel we are stupid, have bad memory, and are willing to let Him lead us and guide us through.”
From God’s words and the sister’s fellowship, I understood that my worry was useless, whether I could pass the exam or not, it was not up to my own ability, but it is in God’s plans and orders. I should still study but I had to correct my attitude, and needed to entrust my difficulties to God and rely on God. Afterward, I felt that I had my reliance and became much relaxed. My previous worries, concerns and fears seemed to be gone. From that day on, I prayed to God every day, looking to and relying on God when I studied. Unknowingly, my mindset changed a lot. After stopping desperately memorizing the questions, I never worried if I can pass the exam, willing to put the result of the exam in God’s hands. The things I cared about every day was to maintain a normal relationship with God, performing my spiritual devotions and having gatherings as scheduled, and then go to study for the exam. Slowly, I felt that I was more clear-heading, not like in the past when I had headaches. What’s more amazing was I managed to memorize almost all the questions in 8 days. On the day of the exam, I quieted my heart and entrusted everything to God. After having passed the exam easily, I successfully got my post certificate. The moment when I saw the result, I knew clearly it was all God’s doings and blessings. For the first time in my life, I felt that looking upon God and obeying God will make my heart so peaceful and assured.
To Be Continued …
Part Two: Sincerely Depending on God in All Things Is the Wise Choice (II)
