By Jingxin
When I was young, I was very envious of people who were very successful in their careers. I also resolved that when I grew I would certainly be a strong and successful woman and rise high in society. After high school, I got a job to make money instead of going on to university. When I started a family, I saw that my relatives and friends were living a rich life, and their children were studying in good schools. Consequently, I vowed in heart that I must work hard to make money so that my family would have a lifestyle that others would envy, and my daughter would also get into a good school. Therefore, I began to look everywhere for ways to make money. My friends told me that clothing industry was profitable, so I began to do the clothing business. Later, I heard that people could make more money by doing clothing business in Italy than in China, and so I decided to do business in Italy. However, my family disapproved of my decision, saying that my daughter was too young to live without me and I must take care of her at home. Despite my family’s opposition, I left my five-year-old daughter behind and went to Italy alone for the sake of earning more money. When I got there, I first worked in a clothing factory for 18 hours every day. Being not good at cutting out, I was slower in work than others, so I was often scolded by my boss. In order to improve my skill, I learned to flatter my colleagues. Meanwhile, I also put much more effort into learning the skill. Several years later, I was basically proficient in the skill. Then I started a clothing processing factory together with my friend. I worked much harder than before, because I had to deal with everything in the factory. I was often so busy that I even had no time to have meals, and I could sleep for only about four to five hours each day. The extremely long and heavy work made me, who was thin and small, even more wasted. What was worse, I got severe gastritis. I felt unbearable pain in my stomach when it attacked me. But in order to earn money, I continued to work with pain. In this way, I worked there for twelve years. Afterward, given that I could no longer hold on and need to apply for a retirement pension in China, I had no choice but to return to China for recuperation.
After going back to China, I bought a house immediately and a car for my daughter, which made my relatives and friends very envious. They praised me for being competent and achieving something. I was so delighted to hear that. I thought: I finally live a better life now. It is so good to be rich! However, not long after that, my daughter had an accident when she was driving. It cost me a lot to deal with this issue. Besides, I spent fortunes on treatment for my disease. As a result, in less than two years I ran out of the money I had earned over the past decade. So arrogant was I that I was unwilling to admit defeat. Thus, I started to prepare to go abroad to make money again, despite the fact I was not fully recovered and was already 50 years old. My family tried to persuade me to have a good rest or to find a job in China. But I didn’t listen to them at all, because I believed it was impossible to make big money at home. So I went against my family again, and came to the U.S.
When I got there, it was difficult for me to find a job, because I couldn’t speak English and I was too old. At first, I got a job in a clothing factory, but I quitted later because the salary was too low. I wanted to find a job with a higher salary. Later I heard my friend say that people could earn much by working as a massage therapist. So I managed to get a job in a massage parlor. The customers there were all strong, so each time when I massaged them, only with all my strength could I relieve their fatigue. Because I was thin and not completely recovered from illness, I was often so exhausted that I had a sore back after work every day. Although I was tired, I was delighted to see the accumulation of money in my bank account, believing that in a few years’ time, I could earn lots of money and went back home. In order to attract more customers, I served each of them with all of my heart. Gradually, I had more and more customers, which sometimes made me too busy to have meals. Over time, I often felt physically weak, and even worse, I got a sever cervical spondylosis which hurt so much that I often couldn’t sleep at night. Even so, I was still working, because if I took a day off, I would earn less money. In order to earn more money, I endured the pain and continued working.
In June of 2017, my colleague bore witness to God’s kingdom gospel to me. Through her communications, I knew that God created the heavens and earth and all things, and that after creating all things, God is in control of everything. I also understood various aspects of the truth such as God’s management plan for saving the mankind, how to discern the true God from the false ones, and so on. We also watched various videos that praise God with dances, songs and recitations of God’s words of the Church of Almighty God. Although there were many truths that I did not understand, I liked to listen to the fellowship of my colleague and loved to watch those videos. Watching how freely the brothers and sisters in these videos were dancing and singing to praise God, I was deeply engaged, feeling that believing in God makes people happy and blessed, and I also loved living in that way. Therefore, I accepted the work of Almighty God in the last days and lived a church life.
Not long after, I asked for two months’ leave to learn English due to the need of the work. During that time, my sisters often came to fellowship with me. Little by little, I understood some truths. Afterward, as long as I had time, I would read God’s words and listen to hymns, feeling relaxed and happy. Once in a meeting, I saw these words of God: “Regardless of differences in ability, intelligence, and willpower, people are all equal before fate, which does not distinguish between the great and the small, the high and the low, the exalted and the mean. What occupation one pursues, what one does for a living, and how much wealth one amasses in life are not decided by one’s parents, one’s talents, one’s efforts or one’s ambitions, but are predetermined by the Creator.” “Because people do not recognize God’s orchestrations and God’s sovereignty, they always face fate defiantly and with a rebellious attitude, and they always want to cast off God’s authority and sovereignty and the things fate has in store, hoping in vain to change their current circumstances and alter their fate. But they can never succeed and are thwarted at every turn. This struggle, which takes place deep in one’s soul, brings profound pain of the sort that carves itself into one’s bones, as one fritters away their life all the while. What is the cause of this pain? Is it because of God’s sovereignty, or because a person was born unlucky? Obviously, neither is true. At bottom, it is caused by the paths people take, the ways they choose to live their lives. … When you repeatedly investigate and carefully dissect the various goals that people pursue in life and their myriad ways of living, you will find not one of them conforms to the Creator’s original intention with which He created humanity. All of them draw people away from the Creator’s sovereignty and care; they are all traps which cause people to become depraved, and which lead them to hell. After you recognize this, your task is to lay aside your old view of life, stay far from various traps, let God take charge of your life and make arrangements for you; it is to try only to submit to God’s orchestrations and guidance, to live without individual choice, and to become a person who worships God.”
God’s words made me have an immediate realization: All things are in the hands of God, and our fate is also controlled by Him. What occupation we pursue and how much wealth we accumulate in our life have nothing to do with our talents or efforts. Instead, they are based on God’s rule and preordination. It reminded me of the past years in which I worked so hard abroad alone. I often worked overtime and suffered anything, just to earn more money. It was really heartbreaking and bitter. I had thought that I would live a better life after earning some money, but instead I got sick because of a long period of hard work. Not only did I have to spend money on my treatment of disease, but my daughter’s car accident also cost me a lot. As a result, in less than two years, I nearly used up the money I had earned by my hard work for over ten years. It really is true that there is no use no matter how well man has proposed. However, I still refused to give up, firmly believing that as long as I worked hard, I would recoup the money. After coming to America, each day I worked my fingers to the bone, and hardly had a rest all year round. However, no matter how hard I worked, I still didn’t earn much money. Thinking back on the road I had taken, because I didn’t know the sovereignty and arrangements of God, I always wanted to rely on my hands to cast off His sovereignty. But in the end, what it brought me was nothing but pain and sadness. Through the revelation of God’s word, I understood that we humans are unable to control our own fate. Only by obeying the sovereignty and arrangements of the Creator, and doing whatever we are capable of, can we live a relaxed and free life. In the following days, I even more hungrily read God’s words.
Soon the two months passed, and I was going back to work. One of my friends recommended a job in another state to me, saying that the job was high-paid and it provided food and accommodation. I felt that this job was very good and suited me very well, but then I thought: “If I work there, I can’t attend meetings freely, because I don’t have too much energy after working later. But if I continue to work here, I can’t earn so much money as I work in that state.” After a struggle, I decided to work in that state. Later at a meeting, when I told this to my sisters, they communicated to me about the value and meaning of pursuing the truth, and advised me to find more time to attend meetings and read God’s words. They also fellowshiped about the principle of finding jobs for Christians—choosing the work that didn’t delay believing in God or attending meetings. However, I couldn’t accept what the sisters had said. I thought: I don’t mean to not attend meetings. I will make time for meetings after my working condition stabilized. Besides, the job is much better paid. If I miss it, I will lose the chance of making lots of money. But then again: My sisters said so was to care about me. They are afraid that I will be too busy to attend meetings, which will harm my own life in the end. After turning the thought over and over in my mind, I still didn’t know how to choose. Thus, I came before God to pray and seek: “O God, now facing the matter of whether or not I go to another state for work, I don’t know how to choose, and I still can’t completely let go of my desire for money. Please guide and enlighten me to understand Your will so that I can practice according to it.”
After that, in a meeting, I saw the word of God: “‘Money makes the world go round’ is a philosophy of Satan, and it prevails among the whole of mankind, in every human society. You could say that it is a trend because it has been instilled in the heart of every single person. From the very beginning, people did not accept this saying, but then they gave it tacit acceptance when they came into contact with real life, and began to feel that these words were in fact true. Is this not a process of Satan corrupting man? … Regardless of how much experience someone has with this saying, what is the negative effect that it can have on someone’s heart? Something is revealed through the human disposition of the people in this world, including each and every one of you. How is this thing that is revealed to be interpreted? It is the worship of money. Is it hard to remove this from someone’s heart? It is very hard! It seems that Satan’s corruption of man is deep indeed! So after Satan uses this trend to corrupt people, how is it manifested in them? Do you feel that you could not survive in this world without any money, that even one day without money would be impossible? People’s status is based on how much money they have, as is the respect they command. The backs of the poor are bent in shame, while the rich enjoy their high status. They stand tall and proud, speaking loudly and living arrogantly. What does this saying and trend bring to people? Is it not true that many people make any sacrifice in the pursuit of money? Do many people not lose their dignity and integrity in the pursuit of more money? Moreover, do many people not lose the opportunity to perform their duty and follow God for the sake of money? Is this not a loss for people? (Yes.) Is Satan not sinister to use this method and this saying to corrupt man to such a degree? Is this not a malicious trick?”
God’s revelations are extremely right. I was basing my life on satanic philosophies like “Money makes the mare go,” “Money is first,” and so on. I thought that money was something I could depend my life upon, and that chasing after it was my life goal. We wouldn’t have a place to stand on in this society without money. We needed money for almost everything, like the household expenses, visiting our relatives and friends, and children’s study. Without money we were unable to take a single step forward, and only money could change our fate. So in order to earn money, I left my young daughter and husband behind and worked abroad for over ten years. During this period of time, I was subject to people’s cold shoulders and bullying and learned to flatter my colleagues. After so many years of running around, however, I didn’t make fortune, but the relationship between me and my family became more and more distant. What was worse, I completely ruined my health. Now I finally understood that poisoned by the satanic philosophies, such as “Money makes the mare go,” “A man dies for money; a bird dies for food,” and so on, I had already been a slave to money. I lived amidst the suffering of Satan, being ravaged and corrupted by it. Look at the people in modern society. In order to earn money, some people are willing to act as a mistress, abandoning their integrity and self-respect. Some families even go to the court for properties. There is no family affection to speak of at all. Some people buy and sell human organs to make money, with their humanity and conscience completely lost. Some people work day and night for money, which in turn exhausts their health and even takes their lives. Satan is just using money to corrupt us so that we are part human, part ghost, having no integrity and self-respect to speak of at all. And thus Satan achieves its goal of devouring all of our humanity in the end. After thinking of these, I realized Satan was using money to trap me into keeping busy earning money so that I wouldn’t have enough time to seek the truth and worship God, which in the end would lead me to miss the opportunity of salvation. This was Satan’s sinister motive. When I had some discernment of the methods with which Satan corrupts man, I was no longer willing to be deceived by it again. Afterward, I gave up the work in that state, and then I found a job nearby. The salary was not low, and I could attend gatherings regularly. Thank God!
Once, I read a passage of the word of God: “People spend their lives chasing after money and fame; they clutch at these straws, thinking they are their only means of support, as if by having them they could live on, exempt from death. But only when they are about to die do they realize how distant these things are from them, how weak they are in the face of death, how easily they shatter, how lonely and helpless they are, with nowhere to turn. They realize that life cannot be bought with money or fame, that no matter how wealthy a person may be, no matter how lofty their position, all are equally poor and insignificant in the face of death. They realize that money cannot buy life, that fame cannot erase death, that neither money nor fame can lengthen a person’s life by a single minute, a single second. The more people feel this way, the more they yearn to keep on living; the more people feel this way, the more they dread the approach of death. Only at this point do they truly realize that their lives do not belong to them, are not theirs to control, and that one has no say over whether one lives or dies—that all of this lies outside of one’s control.” “Only when one accepts the Creator’s sovereignty, submits to His orchestrations and arrangements, and seeks true human life will one gradually begin to break free from all heartbreak and suffering, and to be rid of all the emptiness of life.”
From God’s words, I saw that only by seeking the truth will we be going down the true path of life. Regardless of how much money we have, and how high our position is, all of these things can’t be exchanged for our life. Some people rush about for money and fame in their lives. However, when their lives end, they finally know that in the face of death, it is no use even if they are fabulously wealthy and their status is illustrious, and ultimately they remain empty-handed. Actually, no matter how much money we earn, we can do nothing in the face of death, because everyone is equal before it. Indeed, this is true. Even though I am rich enough to be highly respected by others, if I lose my life, however much more money I have, what meaning will it be? Only when I come before God, accept and submit to His sovereignty and arrangements, and seek the truth, will I live a meaningful and happy life.
Now I no longer work my fingers to the bone as I did in the past, but rather find more time to read God’s words and attend gatherings. Although my salary is lower than before, I am very happy and released in life. I am no longer distressed at money, and my mental outlook is getting better and better. My colleagues and friends said that I have changed a lot and look better. I know that it is God’s words that change me and turn around my wrong views on life, so that I come before Him and seek the truth. I’m grateful for God’s salvation that allows me to walk down the bright path of life.
