Yong Jin
Born in a common peasant family, I was taken good care of by my parents and siblings since childhood and lived a comfortable life. After marriage, my husband took great care of me, my child was clever and sensible, and I considered myself as the happiest woman in the world. But calamity descended from the sky and my husband got seriously sick out of sudden. So, I have to shoulder the responsibility of supporting my family. I felt as if I had fallen into hell from heaven. To treat my husband’s illness, I spent all our savings, and had no choice but to borrow money from relatives and friends. However, for fear that we would borrow their money, they all began to avoid and distance themselves from us. The villagers also ridiculed and looked down upon us. The difficulty and hopelessness of my life made me live in misery. Later, in hope of curing my husband, we saw lots of doctors, even prayed to Buddha for help, divined the cause and so on, but he showed no signs of improvement. Faced with this situation, I lost confidence completely, felt too painful and tired, and didn’t know when such a life would end.
When I was disheartened about my life, in 2006, God’s salvation of the last days came upon me. I saw God says, “When you are weary and when you begin to feel something of the bleak desolation of this world, do not be lost, do not cry. Almighty God, the Watcher, will embrace your arrival at any time. He is keeping watch by your side, waiting for you to turn back around. He is waiting for the day you suddenly recover your memory: when you realize that you came from God, that, at some unknown time you lost your direction, at some unknown time you lost consciousness on the road, and at some unknown time acquired a ‘father’; when you realize, furthermore, that the Almighty has always been keeping watch, waiting there a very, very long time for your return. He has been watching with desperate longing, waiting for a response without an answer. His standing watch is beyond any price, and it is for the sake of the human heart and the human spirit. Perhaps this standing watch is indefinite, and perhaps it is at an end. But you should know exactly where your heart and your spirit are right now” (“The Sighing of the Almighty” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). God’s word flowed into my heart like a warm current, consoling my painful and sad heart. I couldn’t stop my tears from falling and my heart was overflown with gratitude to God. At that moment, like a wandering child who finally returned to mother’s embrace after having suffered greatly for many years, I had an unspeakable excitement and emotion within. I felt I had reliance and kept thanking God in my heart. When I was forced into a corner, God took me to His house, comforted my broken heart, made my sad heart find the warm home. However, just as I was bathing in the happiness of believing in God, something unexpected happened….
One night, the power went off. After dinner, I went to the yard to carry some firewood into the room, as my son stood on the step and lighted the way for me with a flashlight. Suddenly I heard a bang noise and my son fell off from the step. I hurriedly ran to carry him into the room and he kept crying. At that moment, I thought: Why? I believe in God, why didn’t He keep my son? But I felt that I should not think like this. I remembered the hymn of God’s word, which I sang along in the daytime: “If you wish to be perfected by God, you must learn how to experience in all matters, and be able to gain enlightenment in everything that happens to you. Whether it be good or bad, it should bring you benefit, and should not make you negative. Regardless, you should be able to consider things while standing on the side of God, and not analyze or study them from the perspective of man (this would be a deviation in your experience). If you experience thus, then your heart will be filled with the burdens of your life; you will live constantly in the light of God’s countenance, not readily deviating in your practice. Such people have a bright future ahead of them.” I kept contemplating these lyrics, suddenly a clearer picture emerged in my heart: Right! God says, “Whether it be good or bad, it should bring you benefit, and should not make you negative. Regardless, you should be able to consider things while standing on the side of God, and not analyze or study them from the perspective of man (this would be a deviation in your experience).” I’m a follower of God. Everything I encountered every day, whether it is big or small is under God’s permission. Whether it is in line with my conceptions, there is God’s intention in it and I should seek and enter the truth. I believe God never commits errors and everything He does is of great benefit to us. Since God said that we shouldn’t see, analyze, or study things from the perspective of man, I should first do as God’s word says, rather than look for external causes. Although I can’t see through this matter at this point, I should obey first, wait, and seek meditatively. As I thought in that way, I didn’t feel awful within any more.
The next day, I met a neighbor and he advised me to visit a hospital where the clinical staff were mostly retired doctors. Then, I took my son there without delay. After reviewing his X-ray, which showed that his right arm suffered a comminuted fracture, the doctor said, “Your son is badly hurt and he needs to be treated as soon as possible. There are two treatment plans for him. One is wearing a cast, which costs less. After that, he can go home directly. The other is having an operation. The fee to be charged is kind of higher and he needs to be hospitalized. Which option do you choose?” Hearing these words, I answered immediately, “My son is so seriously injured. I’m afraid he may not be cured by just wearing a cast. That will affect his future.” The doctor said, “All right. Let’s perform an operation. Please have the money ready.” After asking about it, I realized I didn’t have enough money at all. I told the doctor the fact, then he said, “Or you may go home and discuss this with your family.” Upon hearing that, I thought: But whom can I talk to? My husband is ill, my parents-in-law cold-shoulder us, the relatives and friends steer clear of us. Whom can I discuss with? At that moment, my mind was in turmoil. I thought: Oh God! I don’t know how to proceed in the situation I encounter today. O God! I don’t understand Your intention. What am I supposed to do? At that moment, one phrase of God’s word came into my mind clearly: “Of everything that occurs in the universe, there is nothing in which I do not have the final say.” Thank God! I knew clearly in my heart that God heard my prayer. The guidance and enlightenment of God’s word made my heart suddenly brighten up: Right! God is the Creator and the Ruler of all things. Everything is subject to God’s commands and sovereignty. Whether my son’s arm will be cured is even more controlled by God. I should have true faith in God, and put the arm of my son into God’s hands. I believe that everything God does is good. Then, I wiped away tears quickly and said to the doctor, “Well. Just as you said, please put his right arm in a cast.” He asked me whether I have decided. I answered without hesitation, “I have made up my mind.” After my son had had a plaster cast put on, I brought him back.
After returning home, as per usual, I had meetings and fellowshiped about God’s word with brothers and sisters and worked with them to spread the gospel. One day, my third elder brother came to my home. As soon as he heard this matter, he scolded me, “As we all know, your son’s arm injury is a serious matter. He must have an operation. Otherwise, this will ruin him. Your child is in such a state. But you still have time to believe in God. You are really hopeless!” At that moment, I thought, God is the source of us human’s life. He controls the life of everyone. No one else can control man’s destiny. So, I said to him, “No matter what you say, I’m sure whom I believe in is God, the unique. Whether my son’s arm will get better is not decided by you or me. Only the Creator, God, has the final say.” Hearing my words, my brother left angrily.
After a month, I took my son to hospital for a physical. When the doctor read my son’s X-ray, he said in surprise, “Ah, your son’s arm recovered so soon. There is no crack at all. It’s a miracle! You looked after him so well. I’ve treated many fractures like his, and your son’s healing process is the fastest.” Upon hearing his words, I was moved to tears and kept thanking God in my heart. In fact, I did nothing special but had a little obedience and handed it to God. It is all God’s mercy and grace. All the glory be to God! On my way home from the hospital, I met my third elder brother and he asked me about my son’s arm. I answered, “The doctor said his arm is perfectly fine now. Here is the X-ray.” My brother took the X-ray, looked at it for a while, and gave it back to me, saying, “That’s good.” Then he left without a word.
Later, through communicating with brothers and sisters, I understood that behind the matter I encountered is a battle in the spiritual realm. Because I am a new believer who has not taken root in the foundation of the true way, Satan tried to tempt and disturb me by various environments. First, my son got comminuted fracture. Then, it attacked me through my third elder brother. Satan’s goal is to wreck the normal relationship between me and God, make me deny and betray God, and fall into hell with it in the end. Satan is really too despicable and too insidious. Meanwhile, I saw my stature is so small that I couldn’t discern Satan’s schemes at all. When facing minor setbacks, I misunderstood and complained to God. But God doesn’t hold me to my disobedience, instead, He always enlightens and guides me to overcome Satan’s schemes and temptations, which made me truly experience His love and salvation for me. I thought the hymn of God’s word says, “Whether it be good or bad, it should bring you benefit, and should not make you negative. Regardless, you should be able to consider things while standing on the side of God, and not analyze or study them from the perspective of man (this would be a deviation in your experience)” (“You Should Learn to View Things According to God’s Word” in Follow the Lamb and Sing New Songs). After these experiences, I realize that on the surface, I encountered a bad thing and suffered some hardships, but through them, I see God’s love and salvation. Although my son’s arm got hurt, God is with me throughout the whole process, leading and guiding me and never leaving me. When I felt weak and hopeless, it was God’s word that enlightened and guided me. From the healing of my son’s arm, I see God’s almightiness. Without God’s care and protection, my son wouldn’t have recovered so quickly. In His wonderful and wise ways of working, God led me to gradually understand the truth, so that I can gain discernment and have a growth in life. I realize it is God’s love that has led me till today step by step. Moreover, I see from this matter that God’s wisdom is based on Satan’s schemes. Satan carries out its schemes to make me turn away from God and betray God, while God guides me with His words so that I can have discernment of Satan’s evilness and treacherousness. I see more clearly of God’s almightiness and sovereignty, know that God is the truth, and ascertain that believing in God is the proper path of life. Thank God! All the glory and praise be to God!
